He's the One

A few weeks ago, I read a blog posted by a local bridal magazine that encouraged readers to write a list (during this presumably happy and love-filed time) of the traits they loved most about their partners. I was encouraged to write my own list and was thrilled to share it with friends, family, but especially my new husband. As we have begun navigating the waters of married life, and our faults and quirks are becoming more apparent, it was a nice exercise to put into writing just what it is that I love about the man I married. 

He is a good son. Early on, I realized that my husband and his mother have a strong, close relationship. He respects her, he trusts and confides in her, and, of course, he loves her. Seeing this relationship encouraged me to believe that we would also have a respectful, trust and loved-filled relationship.

His glass is always half-full. Optimism is contagious, and Darius’ is downright infectious. I am a natural born worrier, and at times, have given the stresses of life too much power to overwhelm me. He is able to gently remind me that I need to push through setbacks, and that things always get better if you simply let them.

He is smart. Not only is Darius smart, but in ways too numerous to count. He’s intelligent, socially savvy, intuitive, and curious. He knows things that I don’t know and has opened my eyes to different points of view. But he’s also aware that there is so much left for both of us to learn. I appreciate that he seeks to continue learning, and hasn’t got an ounce of arrogance in him.

He has a great walk. Silly maybe, but one of the first traits I noticed about my husband was his walk. He walks with confidence and a great sense of coordination. You get the sense that this guy has rhythm (which is true!). He walks with purpose and a little bit of swagger that I just love.

He can cook. Seriously, this man can cook!

He is a man of faith. Darius and I have been on a bit of a faith journey together. We come from slightly different religious backgrounds, but our experiences had been very similar. When it became apparent that we would be together for life, I began converting to his religious denomination and shared my conversion process with him. We were able to openly discuss our doubts and questions, as well as share our stories of encouragement and gratitude. As a married couple, we have asked God to be the third partner in our marriage so that when either of us simply needs more than the other can give, we will have one more heart on which to rely.

He has the BEST sense of humor. Darius doesn’t have to try to make me laugh. He doesn’t have any great one-liners or prepared routines. What he does have is a knack for seeing the humor in everyday mishaps and an awesome ability to embrace his own quirks. We laugh every single day. Because he is so comfortable with himself, I am more comfortable letting my freak flag fly, too. If only these walls could talk…

He brings out the best in me.  Perhaps this is selfish, but I’m most grateful for the person I have become since meeting my husband. He is so genuinely good and decent, and our personalities are so compatible, that I truly believe we bring out the best qualities in one another. I feel stronger, smarter, more ambitious, kinder and more loving than I ever have before. I feel more beautiful than I ever have before. I want to be more generous and open-minded because of my husband. I know that I’m a better person than I was before we met.

He’s a man with a plan. My husband is ambitious. He frequently reminds me that “Rome wasn’t built in a day” when I become impatient. He sees large goals as a series of short-term goals and works to get from one place to the next. He’s not content to allow life to simply happen to him, nor is he content to let me give in to that sort of thinking. He only gives in to impulse when there is no chance that our family or relationship could be harmed. I appreciate his thoughtful approach to life and his endless desire to see our marriage grow and thrive.

He gets it. This quality is less about anything specific and more about the fact that my husband just “gets it.” He knows how to live his life in a way that mellow, but with a sense of urgency. He takes nothing too seriously, but has the utmost respect for those things that matter to his friends and family. He sees the ultimate big picture and I think that’s what keeps him content. It is impossible to spend time with him and not realize that this is a man with a great understanding of people and the world around him.